The arrival of our second princess

It’s been more than a week now since I last wrote and so much has changed since. It’s scary how fast time flies huh. And yes I’ve given birth to a healthy baby girl and loving every single moment with her. The whole birthing even though not my ideal birth experience, went well despite all the negativity surrounding caesarean deliveries.

So anyway after signing off the pc, I went back for a quick nap and woke up just in time to make pancakes for my little girl. I got teary eyed thinking after this I would spending less time with my firstborn and wasn’t looking forward to the days I would be spending at the hospital without her. We sent her to school and told her when she comes over the hospital after school, her meimei would be out to greet her. With a heavy heart I bid her goodbye while at the same time it beats super fast en route to the hospital.

Reached the hospital just slightly after 9 and checked into the admission office to finalize the necessary paperwork. After everything’s been sorted out we were escorted to my room for the next few days. To be honest, the hospital really need some upgrading works done as the facilities isn’t top notch anymore. So anyway once I was in the room, the nurses came and prep me for the surgery (shaving, enema and all) I was getting very nervous as they got down all my details, and kept asking me what’s the horoscope for the baby. Eh? It seems most couples who choose elective caesarean deliveries would have their preferred time of birth. Me? I just told them anytime between 11 and 3 is fine by me. So I waited, and waited, and wished I could eat something and almost snatched the piece of bread off hubby’s hand. Everytime I hear the sounds of wheels coming closer, I sat up on my bed and told my husband this is it, it’s finally happening! But it wasn’t. Close to 11, a female doctor whom I thought was the nurse came in and brief me on epidural, turns out she was , well supposed to be my anaesthetist. And the waiting continues.

Finally at noon, the OP nurses came and said it’s time. Hubby would have to wait in the lounge outside of the OP while they prepare me for the surgery. To be honest I felt really miserable when they wheeled me into the OP leaving my hubby outside. And suddenly this male doctor stood next to me and told me the female anaesthetist had to go elsewhere due to some reason. I wasn’t pleased and didn’t really digest what he was telling me, all those medical jargons. Plus he wasn’t smiling.

12.15pm , they got me onto the surgery table, asked me to loosen my hospital gown while he administer the epidural and all this was going on with hitz.fm blaring in the background. Pitbull’s Rain on Me was playing while I was thinking ‘ they are going to cut me open soon’ .

The procedure wasn’t that painful but I cried, I just couldn’t help it. It was really overwhelming sitting on the table watching the nurses bustling around preparing the tools for my surgery and the delivery of my little girl while epidural was administered into my spinal. My anaesthetist kept asking if it’s the pain while a nurse came and held me close trying to console me. I told him no it’s not the pain, just felt very overwhelmed. Another nurse passed me a gauze for my tears. I felt so vulnerable. As they laid me down, hubby came in and he asked me if I’m alright. I kept telling him I can still feel my legs but it was tingling. Then the shaking came, my teeth was chattering but I didn’t feel cold. I was warned about this but didn’t expect it to be that bad. Even hubby got scared at the sight of me shaking like that. Oxygen mask had to be put on me because I was having difficulty breathing, not sure if its panic attack or because I was lying flat on my back and baby was still pretty high up. I was a mess, shaking and kept on sucking on oxygen while tears rolled down my cheeks. Hubby kept on apologizing to me that I have to go through all this. My anaesthetist was nice, he took over from the nurse the moment I started crying and held my other hand. He kept reassuring me it’s normal and that everything would be over soon.

Minutes later my gynae came and said it’s time. After what I thought was eternity, I heard my lil girl’s cries. I cried along with her, hubby had tears on his face while he went on saying ‘That’s Jocelyn, our girl is out!!’. They brought her to my cheeks and I gave her a quick peck on the cheeks before the nurse brought her to the cleaning table to clean her up. Hubby wanted to stay with me while they finish up with the surgery but I told him to go to Jocelyn, I would be ok I reassured him. My gynae said everything went well and I did great. I’m just glad everything is over.

As I waited in the recovery room alone I kept on asking the nurse in duty how long would I be in the room as I wished to breast feed my little girl soonest possible. Luckily she was patient with me harassing her every 2 minutes. 1.30pm I was wheeled into my room and I saw my hubby carrying my second child. I quickly asked to hold my girl and held her close to me before I feed her. Yes within the first hour of her arrival to the world and I was already breastfeeding her. Actually it would be much later because they need to give her all the necessary shots and a bath but boy my girl clearly made her stand, she was fussing and crying alot that the nurse asked my hubby to bring her to me for feeding.

It’s funny how I was dreading the idea of being cut open and yet after a week later I almost forgot the whole ordeal. And with Ashley even though it was a natural birth I didn’t get to bond with her immediately yet with Jocelyn despite not being my choice birth I bond with her almost right after the delivery.

{Hubby holding Ashley before handing her to me}

{Me + Jocelyn after her feed – yeap I looked pretty cheerful for someone who just had a major surgery}

{Jocelyn after her bath and shots}